Words, Words, Words and Special Offer+ Bonus
January 2023

Bless the heavens above, it's a new year!!!

We know the drill: on January 1, we assign ourselves all the resolutions that promise us perfection. All we need is the commitment and discipline and accountability to win this game of perfecting ourselves. Sounds like fun, right?

It's a set-up for failure. Sometimes we make it through the first week or first month, but being human gets in the way of perfection:

• 45% of Americans make resolutions every year...
• Only 8% succeed.
• And, 80% have forgotten or given up by February.

Ohhhhh, the punishment, the shame, the judgment...

Imagine how this misery leaks into our daily lives, our relationships, our happiness!

I confess: I am still learning this lesson the hard way. A diet is always at the top of my resolution list. In January, lettuce prices are sky-rocketing; gym memberships are all the rage. I'm older, losing poundage takes longer. I should know this by now. Unfortunately, I love to eat. I savor every bite of dark chocolate, creamy mashed potatoes, and warm bread. And, because I pulled my back during the Holidays, instead of taking my long, robust walks everyday, I go to physical therapy. As a result, I lost my waist.

Anne Lamott has always been a favorite writer. Her words speak to my own, along with her humanity and humor. She wins me over every time: "Diets make you fat, 95% of the time. We gain it back, plus 5lbs. We lose it, and it finds us again... Enjoy these musings from Anne Lamott for perspective.

2022 brought me to my knees. The struggle and suffering with Covid and health matters, the losses, the not knowing for so so so long, the shifting priorities, and, yes, time passing. ENOUGH! I'm losing precious time. I want to be happy, one day at a time.

Welcome 2023. Welcome Today.

I remembered my One Word exercise, the exercise I would do with my family, my coaching clients, my team at work: reflective, introspective, truth-telling, do-able, empowering. Choose ONE WORD to become your mantra for this year. ONE WORD that speaks to your Best Self. ONE WORD that fuels your every action, directs your every decision, and supports your growth and awareness. Choose ONE WORD that you know you can live by because it resonates with your needs right now. ONE WORD that will better serve you: courage, patience, engage, gratitude, health, humor, breathe, play, discover, generous, serve...you get the idea.

My word is INTENTION. Intention creates energy. It forces me to choose what I want the outcome to be in a relationship, a communication, an experience. It's my mind that decides how I want to live this day, who I want to spend my time with. And if my intention is to be healthy, for example, then I will take a pause from those french fries and take a longer walk!

Because I've seen this exercise deliver results:

• We will define and choose the right word for you right now!
• We will identify the benefits YOU receive by putting your word into action.
• Your word will become your compass in your daily life.

Because this exercise requires you 'to go deep' in choosing the One Word that inspires you, excites you, engages you, perhaps a collaborative effort works best to engage your essence, your core...And, because my intention is to serve you:

BONUS: First 10 people who sign up will receive a FREE signed copy of my third book, Outrageous, Courageous and Highly Contagious, a leadership storybook that is a provocative fun-read for people ready to ignite Life in themselves and others.

Email Susan here to schedule your session.

C'mon...Let's do this!

Susan Brooks

I met Toby when we both participated in an online Wise Aging class during Covid. Her comments were provocative. And she was both strong and vulnerable. I liked her.

She introduced me to Fisherman's Friend lozenges for my annoyingly persistent cough, and sure enough, my cough went quiet, at last. She also recommended a book I immediately purchased by Suzette Elgin, The Grandmother Principles:

• Grandmothers already have tenure.
• Grandmothers delegate.
• Somebody has to be the grown-up.

Yes, I liked Toby, a lot. She didn't seem to mind my asking her so many questions, especially after she mentioned she was a Commissioner and Judge Pro Tempore of the Superior Court. Toby was a judicial officer.

• "I remember the day and the very moment that I made the decision to be a judge. I was in 6th grade and worked as a school crossing guard, so that the children were safe crossing the street from the school. I was holding up the STOP sign, and the children crossed the street. I recall the very moment. I knew it was a fact. I never wavered, and it never paled for me."

Imagine knowing you're calling so absolutely in 6th grade!!

I don't often meet a judicial officer without her robe on! Other than jury duty, I'm not often in a court room.

My battery of questions took over this interview:

What are the lessons you learned serving on the bench?

• There is an enormous difference between sitting in judgment and being judgmental. Judgmental is not hearing the other side. There is a legal maxim: audem alterem partem. It means hear the other side. Did you know that Alexander the Great heard people argue their cases before him. The story is that he held his hand over one ear as he heard one side, and then he held his hand over the other ear when he heard the other side. His motive was to demonstrate to all parties that he listened to each side.
• What you see on the surface is not necessarily the truth in a situation. Don't jump to conclusions. Don't let prejudices cloud your judgment. Know the facts before you decide. Keep the quest for fairness.
• A judge must care, must have a fire in her/his belly, yet remain objective. You're only as good as your last best decision. The decisions I made were part of a sense of honor, some sense of that which is right, fine and high. I had to fly within to be the best I could be.
• I'm challenged today. I detest lies and vicious gossip. Bigotry is a cancer on the human soul. In a country where education is free, where libraries are free, where people can learn, it boggles the mind that people choose willful ignorance. Ignorance leads to violence...

Tell me about Pickle Puss:

• Your countenance is how you face the world. You can smile, stay neutral or frown. Frowns make frown wrinkles on your face. Frowns look as though you just ate a pickle, what we called "pickle puss." My Mom and I would say 'pickle' as a shorter version whenever either of us saw the other frown. It was a great reminder! It does brighten one's mood to turn a frown upside down and it sure is easier to be objective.

How did you come home and be a parent after a day of being on the bench?

• My daughter and I came up with the term ROBE together, as a code word to get my attention. That and a Pickle Puss face kept the balance at our house!

Toby is a grandmother of 5 grandchildren, and she treasures and appreciates every moment with them all. She lives by the Grandmothers Principles, and she understands the gift it is to be a grandmother:

• Grandmothers get to cradle the future in their arms...

Toby stays in awe of our global evolution on a daily basis:

• I'm still amazed by the wheel...who'da thought?

Thank you, Toby, for giving us an inside look of what it's like to serve on the bench as a profession and a grandmother and a great model as a Modern Elder.

(Respecting Toby's privacy, let Susan know if you want to connect with Toby Gerst.)

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*Chip Conley, best-selling author and speaker, hospitality entrepreneur and leading thought leader, created The Modern Elder Academy's mission "to inspire the ability to reframe a lifetime of experience and recognize one's mastery, relevance, and value in the modern workplace." The Modern Elder* is Conley's term and effort that "liberates and inspires us to embrace wisdom as a path of growing whole, not old...The Modern Elder marries wisdom and curiosity."

Every month this newsletter will Feature the stories and wisdom of Modern Elders.

Share your Modern Elders with us...maybe it's you!! Please send in your Modern Elder Story along with a one-line Wisdom statement plus photo to be featured. CLICK HERE TO SUBMIT.

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